Free Me
by Moment For Life
Summary: After their conversation in the gymnasium, Rose goes back to her family, leaving Jack. Then the ship hits an iceberg. A complete re-write of an older story.
1. Prologue

**Free Me**

In the dim light of her state room, he possessed her thoughts. Her bed was untouched, tomorrow's rich blue and white dress hung out ready for the day's events. Dinner had been a long affair; her eyes had been so obviously transfixed on the chair where he had sat the evening before and stolen the attention of every respectable person present. If high society hadn't agreed with his presence at the table, they had remained quiet and enjoyed the company.

He had become the light in her dull and ill life. After enduring two painful hours in her world he had taken her into his; an entirely separate life which existed just a few decks below her feet. The poor accepted her, danced with her and so did he. Jack Dawson.

She closed her eyes and allowed herself to indulge in the dance they had shared, so close and so personal. She hadn't known this world had existed and truth be told she never wanted to leave.

When she had reached her own world again, the light had faded and he had been right; the fire inside her did burn out and yet his words affected her in such a way she never thought possible. He loved her fire, he had offered her a hand into another world and yet all she heard was her Mother's shrill warning to never seen him again. Cal's anger had frightened her and so she had walked away from him and hadn't looked back. She had declined lunch and remained absent minded since.

He had sought her out to declare how profound his feelings were, his words tickling her ears and she had never heard anything as sweet but she couldn't indulge in such a thing and so she had left him there, alone.

A faint shudder overcame her and then she noticed the beading on her bedroom chandelier tremble. Her wooden desk seemed to vibrate and then the shudder came harder once more.

Her mother's voice in the sitting room ensured she hadn't imagined such a thing. A feeling overcame her, one of pure dread.

 _Something serious had happened._


	2. Chapter two

**Part Two:**

 **April 16th, Carpathia.**

The stormy weather did nothing to help the passengers aboard.

Staterooms were occupied almost double, women cradled their children in hallways and the decks had been almost empty. Carpathia passenger's generosity had touched Rose implicitly. Beds had been made up on the tables in dining rooms, the smoking rooms were full of laid down blankets and yet the meals had remained the same and served as normal. The absolute tragedy lingered in every corridor and in every room aboard.

The Hockley and Dewitt Bukater's had arrived on a lifeboat, met by the Carpathia during the early hours of April 15th. Word had reached Carpathia of the Titanic's situation some hours before and so Captain Rostron had ordered for the ships heating and hot water to be cut off in order to make as much steam for the engines. It set off on course to the Titanic's last known position and it would take four hours doing top speed of 17 knots. At 4am, after navigating through a dangerous ice field. Carpathia recovered 705 survivors.

A honeymooning second class couple had kindly offered their room to the family. Nancy, the young girl had even given up dresses, stockings and a large brown woollen overcoat to Rose. Their maid Trudy shook as she tended to Rose that morning, the full force of the tragedy not yet a reality but would it ever be when just the day before they had all been aboard the safest ship which ran the Atlantic?

Ruth had said very little and Cal had found solstice in bourbon with an old Harvard friend aboard. Both of them had seemed to ignore Rose, as long as she was within their sight then she didn't seem to matter. Nobody had asked how she was feeling and she didn't expect it. Seasickness had hit some passengers from as little as five hours of been onboard. The sea was rough as rain poured onto the slippery decks ensuring that most passengers stayed indoors for the most part. Sleep hadn't come to young Rose that first evening.

On the Wednesday, Rose had spent most of the morning with her Mother, in silence. Ruth had run through some correspondence from family and friends back in Philadelphia and between the small talk and her Mother's incessant need to tell every one of her survival, Rose had felt as though she would go mad. After dressing in a clean dress and taking a bath, Rose had decided to clear her mind of something. So, she left the stateroom after hours.

She stepped over bodies at almost eleven pm, the ship was silent. The occasional sob echoed in a long corridor. It haunted her, the loss still not fully sinking in. She tiptoed down the second-class corridor, her borrowed coat hugged against her body. Her face was pale, she had barely slept and her hair was sat limply around her shoulders. One thing cradled in her mind, the one thing which ensured her no rest.

 _Had he lived?_

The odds were against him; a third class male was least likely to survive. Such thoughts had unsettled her, much more than she knew. She had watched every face, every male laid out but there was one place she hadn't dared to search until now. Third class.

Cal had barely left her side and the truth was she cared less for him now than before. His very presence seemed to sicken her, the way he still prided himself for her survival. His stature was what he believed had saved them, 'bought' them places aboard a lifeboat and managed to secure them a room onboard the rescue ship. A room which a couple had purchased for their honeymoon with their hard-earned money and yet Cal still wasn't satisfied with the décor. One would believe such a tragedy would bring an engaged couple closer, more bonded but the truth was she felt as though she had become a stronger person. A new sense of life had been instilled into her and it was a life which she felt she needed away from her family – or at least Cal. Her mind was fully focused on something else and had been since the moment the Titanic had struck ice. Or someone.

''Can I help you, love?'' A steward whispered approaching from the opposite corridor. His face was friendly, comforting. Rose jumped, startled at his presence as she believed she was alone in complete silence.

''Yes,'' she began. 'I'm looking for my friend. I believe he could be in steerage.''

No other words were needed. She was a survivor of the Titanic. ''Of course, ma'am.''

A narrow hallway loomed as she followed the steward down it, wondering just what would be beyond them. She had struggled to face the survivors, to look into their eyes and see such loss when it would seem that she still had it all. And the truth was, she did. She just wasn't happy. She had questioned whether she was lucky, and whether wanting more than the life she had after such a tragedy was asking for too much but she knew that without knowing of Jack's survival, she would never stop searching.

''Perhaps you should rest tonight.'' The steward suggested calmly.

Her head shook. ''I shan't rest until I know.''

''Very well.''

He walked carefully and she followed, taking note of the grief-stricken faces. The world had become a darker place. She had deemed herself lucky that her family had survived such a tragedy. She hadn't realized just how much her hands shook at this very moment.

''Have you checked the list, Miss?''

Rose pressed her lips together. She shook her head. They reached a set of steps and she carefully followed them down. She had known he had won tickets aboard, chances of his name appearing on the list on that basis were slim. Once they reached the steerage area, she touched her own chest. Women, children and small babies gathered in masses, cradling as they slept. She spotted one or two men slumped against a wall, she choked back a sob.

The steward came to her, concerned for her welfare, with a flourish of her hand she stopped him abruptly. ''At the request of Mrs. Caledon Hockley I wish to be left alone and of course this will remain discreet.'' She whispered forcefully.

She was disgusted in herself to use _his_ name and above all to speak to a kind steward in such a way. She softened immediately, finding her voice. ''Thank for your kindness.'' She added. ''I just fear my family knowing of my whereabouts.'' She confessed.

''My lips are sealed.'' He told her timidly.

She turned to see a long corridor of passengers. She carefully trod, checking every single face, recognizing some as memories of dancing in steerage flashed back at her. Those people leaving Europe in hopes of a better life, carrying their entire belongings with them - all of which was now gone. She choked again.

She locked eyes with a man, alone, he sobbed into his own hands. She felt her own tears come, she could offer nothing to him no comfort nor words of healing. Gathering her own emotions took so much, she wished to lie with them but she had no right to. Oh how she wished her own fortune away, to give each of these people just a small donation; a coat or even words of comfort. She searched the lost souls quietly, most asleep and four corridors filled with such tragedy she could barely swallow the lump in her throat.

All she wanted was to sit and cry with them. Her sobs were silent to not wake them.

There wasn't a sign of him.

 _Oh, Jack._

Regret flooded her but there was very little to be done. She held herself as she walked, weakness took over her body and she reached the end of another corridor. It was dark. She was startled by a young babies cry and then a mother offering a tuneful Irish song to soothe. Rose sought her, slowly approaching. The baby's cries didn't cease, the young mother cradled the child to her chest. Rose stopped before her, sinking to her knees. With one look of unspoken permission she touched the babies red cheeks.

''What a beauty,'' She breathed. The mother found the strength to smile ever so weakly.

''May I?''

''Yes.''

The mother offered her child to the stranger. The crying ceased for a second or two.

''We must sing,'' Rose urged. ''but you must join me.''

'' _Tis the Last Rose of Summer left blooming alone_

 _all her lovely companions are faded and gone_

 _No no flower of her kindred no rose bud is neigh_

 _to reflect back her blushes or give sigh for sigh_

 _I'll leave thee thou lone one to pine on the stem_

 _Since the lovely are sleeping go sleep now with them_

 _Thus kindly I scatter thy leaves o're the bed_

 _where thy mates of the garden lie scentless and dead_

 _So soon may I follow when friendships decay_

 _and from love's shining circle the gems drop away_

 _when true hearts lie withered and fond one's are flown_

 _Oh who would inhabit this bleak world alone?''_

They finished and the child was sound asleep. The Mother shook, using all of her strength to sing. She caressed her child's face, her hand shaking. Rose held the child back to its mother even so carefully. She touched the young woman's face, her hands so warm. ''Be strong, for your little angel.''

She found the strength to nod, silently thanking this angel for the comfort. Rose got to her feet. There was still good in this world; a pure child's love, the bond between a mother and child. Those were the things which would get these people through such a time. The family they had left would become even more precious to them than before. Each moment which passed, she felt as though she was been dragged further and further in Hell.

She tried to remember Jack, his words...

 _''It's not up to you to save me, Jack.''_

 _He stroked his thumb over her skin. It was soft to touch. He was in too deep with her and telling her such things he knew he was at risk. She raised her white gloved hand to touch his. It lingered as she searched his face. He was offering her a way out. One she had never had before. He was serious; she could see so in his face._

 _''You're right. Only you can do that.''_

 _His voice was etched with hopefulness. She grasped his hand tighter. His closeness left her paralysed to the spot. He had such an effect on her it was frightening._

 _She couldn't breathe; his face was an inch or so from hers. If she stayed any longer, the tension would grow stronger. She had to stick to her word. Her eyes met his, glancing to his lips and then back. Her stomach sank._

 _''I think you should leave.''_

 _He swallowed harshly; he loosened his grip on her delicate hand. He sighed, running his right hand through his hair. He bit his lip as he watched her lower her lashes. She couldn't look at him. Why did it feel as though she was forcing herself to do this?_

 _''Rose?''_

 _''No!'' She sharply lifted her face to his. ''Jack, you no longer have a right to be here.''_

 _She removed her hand from his and moved her body away. She was still leaning against the window. She glanced away, concentrating on the leather strap of the electric camel. She heard his breathing slow and he stepped back. Her body quivered beneath the dress and gloves. She was thankful for the full frills to hide such things._

 _He saw her chest rise and fall. He knew she felt something, her eyes had glazed over. He took another step back and as he went for the door, he felt as though he couldn't leave. She was trying so hard to not meet his gaze._

 _''Jack, leave!'' She cried, her voice echoing around the gymnasium. He squeezed his eyes closed as he pulled the door open and left._

In one darkened corner, someone struggled, a blanket cocooned around a body. Rose stepped ever so quietly towards the person. They had disturbed her thoughts of Jack and their final meeting in one solid swoop. Her breathing stopped as though one breath could awaken them. The ships engine could be heard and she felt the motion gently rocking the sleeping bodies. A hand reached out and upwards and then slowly back to their ravelled chest. It startled her, she stood almost looking over the person. She knelt so quietly, leaning forward to touch the hand and then his face came into view half shadowed.

A loud sob escaped before she could stop it. A shaggy dark blonde head covered a sleeping face, his parted lips quivered.

 _He had lived._


	3. Chapter three

**Chapter Three -**

The afternoon of the 17th was clouded by fog. Passengers mainly remained indoors. By this time the true tragedy was dawning on survivors. It had been believed amongst them that another ship would have recovered the rest of the people who had been left behind. Perhaps their lifeboats had arrived once they had slept. Perhaps...

Jack sat upright. He rested himself against the hard wall of the ship. Rose watched as his back seemed to curve at the bottom, as though his spine could not accommodate his weight. He was served soup and a bread roll. Steam poured from the cup and instead of sipping it, he hungrily pulled at the bread with his teeth. Rose sat beside him, a blanket entwined around her legs. She sipped tea daintily and refused to take her eyes away from him. He was pale, shaky and weak. They had exchanged little words since she had found him laid in the corridor the evening before. They were simply grateful for the company of the other.

A steward had served hot drinks amongst those in steerage at hourly intervals, Rose had taken one each time her body still not adjusting to the heat on the ship but her main worry at the moment was Jack. She hadn't even thought of her own family since leaving them the evening before. He had finished his bread. She held out her tea cup to him to offer him a drink. He watched her and gratefully took the cup from her.

''Thank you.''

Tears pricked in her eyes. She took a moment to glance around. Passengers slept, some ate and others had found a way to occupy themselves momentarily whether that be reading or simply chatting to other survivors. They had all become one support mechanism for the other. Jack held the tea cup out to give back to her.

''Finish it,'' she smiled warmly. ''I simply cannot drink anymore tea.''

Jack sipped it again, still clutching his warm soup. ''I heard they offered the brandy out.''

She couldn't help but smile. ''Perhaps this evening we shall indulge.''

…

He slept. This time, Rose held his head as he was propped on her lap. It was a very affectionate thing to do with a man she barely knew and yet her fingers couldn't help but run through his hair. She felt she needed to bring him comfort.

She held back her own tears. She watched his face. The freckles which were speckled over his nose, the small scars on his forehead and she couldn't help but wonder if he had contracted chickenpox as a child. The felt the boat rock rhythmically as though it was offering some solstice to the passengers. An officer approached in the once again darkened corridor. Once he came closer she realized it was the steward who had helped her to steerage the evening before.

''Would you care for some food ma'am?''

She shook her head. ''No, thank you.''

Jack stirred in her lap, his lips pursed as they parted, disturbed by the voices.

''Perhaps a drink?'' Rose whispered. ''Two brandies.''

''Of course.''

The steward went off to proceed with her request. Jack's eyes flickered open as the first thing he saw was Rose's face. He momentarily stretched, the ache filling his bones. He tried to move himself but physically couldn't. Her heart ached to see such a man struggle. He had been the one to encourage her to such things. She placed her left hand beneath his neck as though she was cradling a child's head and moved him into an upright position as she did so.

She could barely see in the dim light but he looked well, or as best as could be. His eyes were sparkling in the darkness.

''You're still here.'' He whispered. She reached out to grasp his hand. It felt warm for the first time and it was an intimate gesture, one he didn't question or recoil from.

''You fell asleep on my lap.''

He rubbed his aching neck with his left hand pulling a face of discomfort. ''I'm sorry,'' he rested his other hand over hers. ''I sleep better with you here.''

''I couldn't leave. I had to know you were all right.''

She remembered his words during their last meeting. _I can't turn away without knowing you'll be all right. That is all that I want._

''I wanted to find you but I was so tired-my body it-''

''I found you.'' She cut him off. ''You were in my thoughts the entire time, Jack.'' For the first time her voice broke as she choked. She had tried so hard to remain strong but she couldn't. He squeezed her hand tighter. He shuffled closer to her.

''I had to think you were safe.'' He felt his own body shake. The cold stabbing at him as though he still laid in the water. ''I was all right.''

She swallowed back tears. ''What happened?''

''I found my way up onto the deck by the time we were allowed through the gates the boats were leaving. Fabrizio and Tommy left to check the other side. That was the last I saw of them.'' She heard his voice crack. ''I found myself at the stern, holding on for my life. I stayed there until she disappeared under the water. I kicked for the surface and found a piece of debris. I stayed there until the boats came back.''

The steward coming back disturbed their moment. He approached carrying two cups full of brandy. ''Ma'am?''

Rose turned to retrieve one cup from him. She gestured to Jack to accept the other.

''Take them steady ma'am.''

''Thank you.'' Rose smiled.

Jack frowned as he looked into the cup. He sniffed it, turning away disgusted. ''Brandy?''

The steward returned to his duties. Jack watched him go.

''Drink it steadily.'' She instructed Jack. ''It will keep you warm. Tea does very little.''

She was still clutching his hand in her left as she held the cup in her right. She felt his coolness. Just by holding his hand she believed she was transferring what little strength she had to him. He brought it to his lips as did she. It burned their insides but in a trickling warm sensation. He took it all back as though his life depended on the medicine.

''I haven't had brandy before.''

Rose lowered her lashes before offering him a warm smile. ''It was never my favourite. Although my father quite enjoyed the tipple.''

She was silent for a moment. Neither of them could even speak words to the other. What could be offered? Apologies or perhaps words of comfort but neither knew such a thing would help. She wished to discuss their conversation in the gymnasium but she couldn't bring up such a thing as this time.

''How is your Mother and Cal?'' He asked quietly.

She raised her eyes to his. ''They are well, thank you. Mother is barely speaking and Cal, well,'' she laughed to herself, ''he finds solstice in bourbon.''

Jack shuffled so that he sat with his legs crossed opposite Rose. He still touched her hand, his other was running an index finger around the rim of the cup. His eyes glanced to it. He thought of her last words of him… _I'm marrying Cal, I love Cal…_

''He should be with you.'' Jack whispered. ''His duty is to take care of you.''

Rose found his words touching and then in that moment, she slipped up. ''It is I, who escaped his company,'' she told him, ''It is I who chose to leave my fiancé in such a tragic time as it feels as though my heart was elsewhere.''

Her words lit a warm feeling somewhere in his stomach which he had never encountered before. ''I see you Rose, when you're with him you become one of them, so normal, the lights maybe on but nobody is there,'' he sighed ''and then when you came to the party I saw the light there. Glimpses appeared when you spoke of becoming an actress and of your dreams but I knew from then that you weren't one of them.''

She lowered her head. ''I have never spoken of my wishes to anybody.''

In that moment he so badly wanted to place his palm on her cheek. ''I think you'll achieve them, one day.''

''In my world?'' She laughed mockingly. ''No, Jack. I am farer away now more than ever. The wedding is in three weeks and I will return to Philadelphia with nothing but memories of this trip.'' She felt a hot tear run down her face but he didn't see in the darkness. ''I have to bury my feelings, this tragedy will stay with me forever but I have to-'' She stopped mid-sentence, she didn't know what she had to do. It was as though all words had failed and she had an 'off' button.

To hear her speak with such negativity caused Jack to feel more than he had in days. His hand automatically came up and his palm rested against her face. She gasped quietly, not from surprise but from the feeling which stirred in her stomach.

''Don't talk like that Rose. We all have choices.''

She closed her eyes and allowed herself the few moments to saviour his hand; something she hadn't done in the gymnasium. She had not allowed herself to become the weakened version and Cal's words had been blasting through her ears at that moment and now she heard nothing but Jack's soothing words.

''What choice do I have? I'm a woman, Jack. A woman about to be married. The choices I have are very limited.''

His eyes shone in the dimness and he pursed his lips as he sighed. ''Do you love him?''

''No.'' She whispered calmly.

''Do you want to marry him?''

She shook her head with Jack still touching her cheek.

''That world doesn't suit you. It suppresses you.''

She was quiet for a moment. She didn't know where this was leading. It was already causing her to go insane. ''The night we met I had been to dinner and neither Cal nor my Mother had spoken one word to me all evening.'' She could feel the tightness in her throat just like that night. ''Mother spoke of the wedding and what a fancy affair it would be. Lucille advising bridesmaid designs and I simply sat there like a piece of the grand furniture; almost as though I wasn't a person and barely even an object.''

Jack listened intently.

''I excused myself as quickly as I could and went back to my room to find Trudy my maid, there was no sign of her.'' She shakily placed her hand on top of Jack's. ''I needed to get undressed for bed and so I tried to do it myself-I couldn't.'' She hung her head almost ashamed. ''Jack I cannot even dress myself…how could I possibly live alone?''

''You would learn.'' Jack told her. ''I was fifteen when my parents died in a fire. I had worked on the farm since I was ten but Mother always had a hot dinner on the table by the time Pa and I had finished. She cooked the food, washed the clothes and mended them and then they were gone and I had to learn to survive by myself.''

Rose narrowed her eyes. It hadn't even occurred to her just how similar they were. ''How did you do it?''

''I taught myself. I had to find my own food and I learned the value of money. I found my own way around. I left Wisconsin five years ago and I never looked back.''

He made it sound so easy and so wonderful. She felt the tears line her eyes. ''What will become of you when we reach New York?'' She asked with a heavy heart.

He shrugged. He removed his hand from her face and clasped his own together. ''I never think past today. I have no reason to do so.''

She sensed his tone and wondered whether or not he would be lonely. Fabrizio had not been on the list. She didn't mention such things. ''You never think past today and yet you encourage me to think about my own future.'' She pointed out.

''Yes. You take one day at a time. You decide what you want your future to be today and then tomorrow you take the steps to follow it through.''

She slumped back against the wall. She felt exhausted beyond her own knowledge.

''I must go soon.'' She mumbled hesitantly.

Jack nodded. He rearranged the blanket around his legs and sat back against the wall. ''Would you take a walk with me tomorrow?''


	4. Chapter four

**Chapter four:**

Her Mother's stare was cold. The sitting room of the second-class lounge was littered with blankets and unworn donated clothing. Rose started for the bedroom which she had occupied since their arrival but Ruth was very much aware she hadn't slept in the bed the evening before.

She counted the seconds until her mother spoke.

''Rose, what is your game?''

She rolled her eyes, she had counted seven.

''I'm sorry?''

Ruth rounded up closer and ushered her into her bedroom. She clicked the door closed behind her. Ruth was physically tired, she looked older than her years and yet she still managed to have a razor sharp tongue.

''Where have you been? I have warned you, this is not a game…''

''No, this is a ship full of innocent people who has endured such loss. I had to help in any way I possibly could.''

Rose removed her coat and she shivered.

''And Mr. Dawson?'' Rose narrowed her eyes at Ruth.

''He is resting in a corridor in steerage. He sleeps on the floor surrounded by crying children and broken families.''

Ruth allowed a gasp to escape her mouth, she delicately pressed her hand to her lips knowing full well where her daughter had been. ''Oh Rose…you fool.''

''Not a fool. Never a fool, Mother. You are the fool.''

Ruth was horrified, never in her life had she been spoken to in such a manner least of all by her own daughter. thorough privacy.

''Rose, stop behaving like a child! You have to be careful.''

Rose laughed. ''Of what mother? Cal finding out I didn't sleep in his bed last night.'' She snapped with her voice raised as she removed her shoes and kicked them to the side of the dresser as though they were worthless. ''So that he couldn't ravage me, or attempt to. That was his reason for the outburst at breakfast two days ago!''

Ruth covered her mouth. ''Don't be so disgusting.''

She laughed pathetically as she held onto the upholstered chair for support. Her anger growing more evident. ''Why mother? Because it's the truth. I don't love Cal.''

Ruth stepped closer to her daughter. ''Do you think I loved your father? We were sensible. We raised one child to be a well behaved lady – or so I thought. Unfortunately, her father was as much as a handful.''

Words like that would have stung Rose just a few months ago but now she felt strong enough to rise above them. Of course her mother would speak ill of her father. ''Well be lucky you didn't have more.'' Rose raised her voice. ''Be glad you don't have a houseful of sons to breed like some damned cattle as I'm expected to do so.''

Ruth glared at Rose. ''I wouldn't expect any woman to do that.''

''Well then tell that to my husband in practice.''

Rose yanked open the wardrobe doors and browsed through the selection of dresses. She tried to distract herself from the headache of a conversation which her mother was forcing her to have. She could feel her mother silently judging her.

''But we are women. Our choices are limited.'' Ruth attempted to calm the situation. ''You need to accept the fact that you are to be a married woman.''

Rose pulled out a plum coloured dress and hung it onto the wardrobe as she pulled out the odd crease before admiring it once again. She knew that her mother hated her choice in dresses, her attitude towards many things and the way that she behaved.

''No mother. You have to accept that I am not happy.''

Ruth realised that there was no reasoning with her daughter. She was ungrateful for everything which had ever been handed to her on a plate. ''What will you do? My God lady, you need to wake up and realise that this is not a game.''

''No, you need to realise that I will not marry Caledon Hockley. Not for you. Not for anybody.''

A knock sounded at the door ensuring all conversations stopped immediately. Ruth glared at Rose for long enough to realise that this conversation would have to continue some other time. Ruth slowly and hesitantly opened the door. She didn't want this conversation to end at this moment but it could not fall upon unwanted ears.

Trudy stood at the door.

''Come on in Trudy. You are just in time.'' She met her mother's gaze. ''I was about to call you for my bath.''

''Yes.'' Trudy quickly felt the tension in the room. She went into the en-suite bathroom and immediately began to run the water.

''Excuse me mother.''

Rose went into the bathroom and closed the door, breaking eye contact with her mother as she did. As soon as she did, she sighed and leant against the wall. She needed support from something right now. She rolled her head against the back of it and tried to calm her racing heart. Trudy tried to avoid gaze but she immediately knew something was wrong. She had encountered arguments between mother and daughter before but they hadn't seemed quite as intense as this.

''Is everything all right?''

Rose pressed her lips together before nodding her head. ''Yes. I do believe I have gained some clarity.''

Trudy unbuttoned the back of Rose's dress silently. ''The bath is running for you, Miss.''

Rose silently thanked her maid. Silence fell over them once more. She thought of her life for a few moments. She had been born into high society and from birth she had been expected highly of. Her Mother and Father had been married for almost a year when she had arrived. Rose's childhood had been spent mostly around the housekeeper, the nanny and of course maids. She had been a curious child, always one to want to play in the dirt rather than sit with her dolls. Her Mother rarely interacted with her and her Father had been away on business most of the time. They had taken trips to New York City occasionally and spent time with extended family at parties and when she was a bit older she had been introduced to society. Caledon Hockley had taken a sparkling to her at first sight at a party in New York, she had been sipping champagne just weeks after her father's death and he had asked permission to court her and within weeks he presented her with a large diamond ring at his family's Hampden estate in February. Her father had died leaving bad debts and the family were close to losing their home and this engagement would save the family name so at just seventeen she had taken the heavy weight upon her shoulders. Initially she had been attracted to Cal, he was handsome and charming but to be engaged was a large commitment and one she felt suffocated by. As soon as they had become engaged he had invited her to his bed on more than one occasion. She wasn't ready to give herself to any man but within weeks she knew she would have to share her body with him.

As she lowered herself into the hot water, Rose felt the ache of her body. She had this luxury and yet the other survivors hadn't even had the facility to wash their hands. The water seemed to be tinged red. She felt a hot tear escape her eyes as she felt as though she could scream from the pain. She reached forward and grabbed the lavender soap. She lathered the bar before running it up and down her skin. Finally, she laid down in the bath and allowed all the dirt and impurities to wash away. Her hair was half in the water and half wet but she didn't care one bit.

She could hear voices outside and as stopped splashing the water for a moment before she could make out that the voices belonged to Cal and Trudy.

''But I need to speak with her.'' He insisted.

''Mr. Hockley, Rose is taking her bath. She is very unwell.''

''But I must see her.''

''No, sir…She is _very_ unwell.''

Then the door clicked and Rose gasped. It was locked. She couldn't remember locking it but she was relived. Her stomach tensed and then relaxed. He couldn't get to her.

''Rose?'' Cal shouted through the door. Rose reached forward and turned the tap on to allow the boiling water to run into the tub. She could no longer hear the voices and could pretend as though Cal wasn't there. It was drowned out slowly. She felt so fixated on watching the steam rise from the bath into the air. Her pain seemed to wash away just enough for her to breath properly again. Her head throbbed, her body was sore. She thought of Jack laid alone in the corridor. She had agreed to meet him at dusk for a walk out on deck. She closed her eyes for a moment and as the water soaked her hair, she drifted back to the night of the dance. He had held her so close to his own body. She fixated on his smile, those eyes which spoke volumes to her, without even uttering a word and the gentle touch of his hand which she welcomed immensely. Even when he had touched her face, he stirred something within her. He had faith in her, faith which she knew she could never have in herself. He had wanted to free her…

She opened her eyes the steam covered the room. If only she could help him too, give him a hot bath to soak the coldness in his muscles and to ease the loneliness which she knew he felt. A tear escaped her eyes. Her choices were not easy. Oh, how she wanted to help those in need. The people who had lost everything and yet she was laid here with everything. The people on the ship had lost their entire belongings, everything which they owned they had carried. Rose had lost what luggage she had travelled with and that was the cause of her mother's tears. She remembered the look of disgust which the third-class passengers had tossed at her when she had gone to speak to Jack the morning after he had saved her. She had been everything which they hated and even now in death, they continued to suffer more so. She gasped, the pain in her stomach becoming more apparent. Jack was alone in the world; he was one of _them._ Even through losing everything he remained gentle and caring. His presence calmed her and just by thinking of him, her deathly pale world seemed to bloom with small bits of colour.

'' _I have nothing to offer you, I know that but I am too involved now. You jump, I jump, remember?''_

His words echoed around. What had he been offering her?

Could she really exchange one life for another and to become a woman who gave up her fiancé, her family and her fine things in order to live a simple life with a man she had barely known two days?

As soon as she was dry and had slipped into a robe, she unlocked the bathroom door. Outside in her bedroom it was silent until she found Cal sat on the made bed with his back to her, her stomach dropped. She pulled the robe tighter around her body.

''Cal, please. Allow me to dress before proceeding with any-''

He turned quickly at her voice. ''But you are dressed in appropriate clothing for this conversation.''

She rubbed her head. He stood calmly and walked around the side of the bed. ''One tells me your bed wasn't slept in last night.'' She said nothing as his eyes bore into hers. ''This warm bed which people given up for you, for us.''

''Yes, I decided to spend time with those in need more so than us.''

''And Dawson?''

She pressed her lips together. She wanted to fight past him and not explain herself but somehow she found the strength to remain calm.

''Mr. Lovejoy is no longer with us and yet you still have me followed like a child.''

He smiled, stepping closer. ''Your mother told me.''

She felt her lips part. Her mother had told Cal where she had been. She felt the bubbling of anger inside. The heavy weight of her engagement ring which she wanted to discard of in that moment.

''My Mother has no right to speak to you of our private conversations, although I shouldn't expect any less.'' She began to run her fingers through her wet hair.

''I thought your disobedience had ceased, obviously I was mistaken.''

She could no longer hide her own overwhelming temper. ''I am not the one who left his family at a time like this in need of Bourbon.'' She pointed her finger directly at him. ''I care about those other people; they have suffered enough. I don't care for you prosecuting me for such things on a daily basis. Now I may be your wife soon but you don't now and never will own me.''

Cal watched her. His fiancée. His eyes were cold for a moment and then came a hard slap across the face. Her head flung to the side as he dealt it with such force. An urgent knock came at the door just as Cal grabbed Rose by the shoulders.

''Not now we're busy.''

Trudy hadn't heard and instead allowed herself to enter. She caught Cal holding Rose with such force her feet were almost off the floor.


	5. Chapter five

Chapter 5 :

''Now, now. What is happening here?'' Trudy came to them. Her face flustered.

''Trudy, leave!'' Cal ordered forcefully not taking his eyes away from Rose. She cried silently. The sting of the blow blossoming.

''I'm afraid I cannot go.'' Trudy came closer as Cal looked at her. ''Or I would have to report my findings here today. Mr. Hockley, let her go.''

He awkwardly let her go and Rose shrunk before pulling her dressing gown further around her body and backing toward Trudy. Cal straightened his suit.

''You are to be my wife, Rose. Don't forget that.'' His voice was cold, almost threatening. She shook visibly and as he left the room she quietly turned to Trudy and sobbed, whispering 'thank you' over and over. Trudy allowed herself to raise her arms around Rose's body, her wet hair sticking to her but in that moment she needed comfort. A tear or two escaped her own eyes, not just for Rose but for every lost soul in the sea. She hadn't allowed herself to think since the sinking and it was only now comforting somebody else that she felt the need to weep.

''There, there.''

Rose pulled away after a minute, her face ever so red and puffy. Trudy touched her cheek, it was reddened and she winced. ''We need some ice for that.''

Rose shook her head quickly. ''No, I have to go. I have someplace to be.''

''But, Miss it may bruise.''

Rose picked up the dress which she had selected earlier and held it up against herself to measure if the fitting was right. ''Well it will be a reminder to him every day. I sharen't deny the reason of its appearance.''

Her hair hung limp around her shoulders and she wore no make-up. Leaving the stateroom had been easier than initially thought and now as dusk was approaching she found herself on the third class desk facing Jack. Her cheek was reddened and obviously open to conversation as Jack tilted his head to the side to see. He was less pale and looked healthier, a large brown overcoat on his back.

At this moment she felt he was her saviour. No one was on the deck, nobody wished to feel the cold. It was slightly foggy and rained spitted now and again. The deck lights lit the deck a little.

''You look better.'' She smiled.

He said nothing. He came closer to her, his boots clattering on the wooden deck and then his hand was slowly reaching up to her face but she didn't wince, she didn't even waver. His slight and delicate touch caused tingles of pain but there was something else there, which made her eyes flicker closed.

''He did this, didn't he?''

Her eyes opened and met his, they were soft and so full of concern. She felt her own tears well and then she shed one or two. He wiped those as well just as tenderly as he touched her.

''Yes,'' she whispered. ''he warned me away from you.''

He clenched his fist and visibly gritted his teeth. She grasped his balled hand and pulled it apart.

''You're not safe with him.'' He snapped. He turned away from her just for a moment as he fought with his own anger. She stiffened as he ran his fingers through his hair. He cared for her, she knew in that instance. Really cared...

''Jack, I-I cannot be saved.'' She reiterated her words to him from days before in the gym. He turned, his eyes softening.

''I know that.'' He turned to the rail to support himself when they heard voices from inside the doorway. They sounded like...Cal and someone else.

She felt the urge to run and run away from all of the pain which she felt. Everything which seemed to pin her down to Cal. She grabbed her dress in her left hand and began to pull out the few pins from her hair and they fell about on deck. Once she had freed her hair, she tossed her gloves overboard after ripping them off with all of her strength. Various lights lit the deck but it was the moonlight and the stars which provided the luminous beauty on her face.

"Rose, what's wrong?"

He had never encountered anyone so hysterical in his life.

The decks were empty. She turned to run and took off into the fastest sprint she could manage. She heard Jack call after her but she didn't care. She needed the freedom. She could barely see where she was going because of her tears. The wind was biting on her face but she continued to run and run as fast as she could until she reached the railing. She slammed herself up against it with so much force she hurt her stomach. She had reached the stern, there was no more ship to run and yet she felt as though she could run away some more. She yearned to spread her wings and be able to fly over the sea and to somewhere so far away where she wouldn't have to deal with these feelings.

She glanced over the side with blurry vision. When her vision cleared, she saw the drop into the cold, dark water of the Atlantic below her. She thought of the souls who were lost and who had succumbed to the sea. She sobbed to herself.

She felt her chest tighten, and she suddenly couldn't breathe. Seconds later, she heard footsteps behind her. Quick and uncertain. It wasn't Cal, she knew that much.

"Jack?" she whispered. He had followed her.

Rose grasped the rail so hard her knuckles turned white. She coughed as she struggled to breathe. Jack felt so helpless. He saw her pain and he placed his hand on her back in an attempt to calm her erratic behaviour. ''I thought it was _him.''_

Jack touched her hands ever so slowly. She struggled with him as she turned to the rail and faced downwards. Jack placed his hands over her fingers and forced her to remove them from the rail all while she repeated called for him to leave her alone. She couldn't be saved. He hurt her hand but he didn't care maybe it would make her see sense. She needed to be awakened, needed to see that he cared for her.

He turned her body to his violently, pressed almost together. She shook as he still continued to hold her hand. She had so much adrenaline; she hated this man for forcing her to do what he said, even though it was for her own safety. Then she opened her eyes and realised that she was so close to him.

Nervously, Rose lifted her eyes from the deck and up to Jack. She watched as his tender artist's hand touched her left cheek. He felt how cold she was and he pulled her body a little closer to his by placing his hand on the small of her back. He kept his hand there, over the sore cheek which had been the source of this. Somehow he seemed to heal it.

He leaned forward ever so slightly, so that their lips came into contact for just the briefest few moments. Rose felt her heart flutter and all of her nerves seemed to disappear. She was experiencing emotions she had never felt before. Gently, Jack took her right hand in his left and moved forward once again. He kissed her again with more passion than the first time. She could feel his warmth next to her, but yet she still shivered. The outside world seemed to disappear. It was just them now. No more words were needed to express what each felt towards the other. Rose felt as though there was no air. She was dizzy. She struggled and time stood still. This was the moment which she played over and over in her head and yet she hadn't managed to prepare herself enough for what would happen.

Jack wrestled with the urge to keep kissing her; he knew he couldn't stop now. She had offered hesitation but when he pulled away from her she began to struggle once again in his grip. He couldn't let her go not when he was so close.

''I can't let you go back there, I just can't.'' He whispered breathlessly as he leant forward to kiss her. This time it wasn't soft it was hungry. They had both held back for so long. Their hands entwined and touched each other. He clutched her to him tightly, needing to feel his body press so firmly against hers. She leant against him, feeling her body ache for him so much. She was so intoxicated that she couldn't stop and they didn't care who saw. They both needed to relive the tension which had built up between them for so long. His tongue massaged hers so strongly that she felt the strength. They pulled each other so closely as though their lives depended on it. The passion which had exploded was immense and she felt the need to feel his naked torso pressed so tightly against her own. She could hear his breathe, the raggedness and the struggle which he had kept up for so long. She had her own struggle but now she felt the unhappiness drain away from her body and it was replaced by a strong need to be with Jack, an almost animal longing which only grew stronger.

She pushed him away for a moment with her right hand on his chest.

"There are so many complications in my life, Jack. If only you knew the half of it. You wouldn't be here with me.''

"Why? What have you done? What's so terrible, Rose? Nothing could stop me from wanting to be here with you. Wild horses couldn't drag me away.''

For a brief moment, their eyes met. She wondered if he actually meant the words he said. From the serious look on his face, he did. Maybe he was feeling what she was. Or maybe he was just trying to be a good friend.

"I do wish you'd tell me."

Cal Hockley had affected her in a way she had never thought she could be affected. Just the name filled her with dread. She would be his forever now. He would find her and her mother would force them to marry. Rose had no skills or experience to work and hold down a job. She probably couldn't even survive as a working class lady. It was hopeless. Maybe she should have given in to Cal's urges and let him have his way with her. Maybe this life was what she was meant to live. Women's choices were never easy, and this choice she was about to make certainly wasn't-but maybe she should just give herself up and marry the man she didn't love.

She settled for a moment. ''My family, well my mother she has very little money left. My father gambled away the money we had, he sold off pieces of his business and estates until eventually he had nothing and he passed away last year.''

Jack listened intently, ignoring the rain which hit the decks.

''Mother found out and immediately I was informed I would have to marry soon. Cal was my suitor and I obliged when he offered my hand. I was oblivious to the scandal it would cause, he was very eligible and had been courting different woman for many years but he is twelve years older than me. Of course Mother as delighted her finery would continue but I was unhappy.''

''Why not leave?''

''My family name was thrust upon my shoulders, if I left my mother would be homeless and would have to succumb to a working life and the truth is I doubt she would survive.''

Jack watched the fragile girl before him. ''What about you?''

She shrugged. ''I have been trying to stay out of his bed for months. To avoid his advances and now I have been punished for it.''

Jack felt his stomach lunge and his eyes widened in shock.

"What?" he asked in disbelief.

"My God, Rose. How could he harm you? How could he have looked at you with anything else other than love?"

Rose's breath become caught in her throat at the word love. She didn't know what Jack was referring to, but she felt more tears escape her eyes and run down her cold face. She could see her own breath in the air and could feel the cold wrapping its chill around her body.

"And now…now I'm so scared, Jack. Trudy found us but what if next time he doesn't stop. I saw the look in his eyes, it was almost past return.''

With that, Jack pulled Rose a little closer to him. She rested her head numbly on his shoulder, felt his arms wrap around her, and in those few seconds, she felt more loved than she had in a long time. She hadn't been embraced for years. She had almost forgotten what it felt like.

"He won't, Rose. I'd never let that happen to you, ever. I could never let harm come to you. I couldn't live with myself if I did."

Jack knew his truth was slowly being revealed. He loved this woman in his arms. He had since the first moment they had met. Just feeling her body next to his made him feel warm in the mid-Atlantic chill. He would do anything to make her happy or protect her in any way. If she wanted him to, that was.

Rose pulled away slowly. She felt the moment turn awkward as she realized what she was feeling now. Stronger feelings than ever…so strong she had to take a step backwards to calm her emotions.

"Now you're here. So, kind, generous, caring, and thoughtful. You care and nobody else ever has. I feel... "

Rose halted, not knowing exactly what to say or what she was feeling. Was it love? Or just an attraction? She didn't know. Her heart felt as though it was being ripped open because she knew as soon as she said those words of what she felt, she would never be able to take them back. She knew as soon as she admitted her feelings to Jack she would have to admit them to herself, and she wasn't sure if she was ready to.

"What, Rose? What do you feel?"

"I feel…"

"What, Rose?" Jack pushed her. He wanted to know. There was no going back now.

Rose took a long pause and a deep breath. She wasn't even sure how to communicate anymore.

"Things I haven't felt before, for you.''

She had said it now. It was admitted. She had thought Jack's reaction would have been worse than it was, for he simply smiled warmly as he looked into her eyes. She could feel herself falling into him.

"Rose, look at me. Please."

He wanted to show her he felt the same way. He wanted her to know how happy she had just made him, to know what she felt and that it matched his feeling exactly.

He leaned forward ever so slightly, so that their lips came into contact for just the briefest few moments. Rose felt her heart flutter and all of her nerves seemed to disappear. She was experiencing emotions she had never felt before.

When he pulled his face away from hers, he gazed at her lovingly to observe her reaction. Shakily, her hand raised to her lips and she gently touched the area where his lips had been seconds before.

Gently, Jack took her hand in his and moved forward once again. He kissed her again with more passion than the first time. She could feel his warmth next to her, but yet she still shivered. The outside world seemed to disappear. It was just them now. No more words were needed to express what each felt towards the other.

"I want to do what I can to make you happy, Rose," he whispered into her ear. He didn't see the tears rolling down her cheeks, but he smiled and gazed at the stars. He felt it was his duty to protect her now.


	6. Chapter six

Chapter six:

He watched her sleep this time. Those rose bud lips which he had sweetly kissed just hours before. She was silent and just the rise and fall of her chest ensured she was peaceful. The redness of her cheek had faded and he wanted to stroke it so gently but decided against it. He couldn't help but stare; a reminder of the fact Hockley had raised his hand to Rose and he suspected it would have happened more than once. His stomach sank as he bit into the inside of his lip then his cheek as he scraped the hair from his face.

Daylight streamed through the porthole of the third class bunk which Jack had found empty. Rose was on the bottom bunk, he had slept on the floor and above them a young lady with two children in one bed and in the bunks opposite were an Irish family.

He had barely slept; he was at peace simply watching her. Her hair spread out on the pillow. His hand hovered above her forehead and then he gently touched her face, sliding his hand down to her cheeks, then her lips. Seconds later her eyes flickered open and upon seeing them his whole world seemed to light up. Sparkling blue eyes met her riveting green and they locked.

He smiled, then so did she. She grasped his hand. Something between them had shifted. Something special.

''Jack?''

''Good morning,'' he whispered, ''I'm sorry if I woke you.''

He entwined his fingers with hers and gripped them so tightly. ''I thought you might have left during the night.'' He sat upright still feeling sleepy.

Her face fell serious. ''No, Jack. I didn't want to.''

She swung her legs out of bed and smoothed out her crumbled dress. She had never slept in her clothes before. She glanced around at the other passengers sleeping, three people to one bunk, then she glanced back to Jack. He had slept on the floor for her, he had given up this bed and rest just so that she could sleep. His blue eyes bore into her. He had kissed her, shown her what life could be like. Her stomach sank but then it seemed to flutter at the same time. It was like flying for the first time. He was on his knees in front of her and she reached forward to touch his face. No one had ever done such a thing.

''Don't marry him.'' The words slipped from his mouth before he could stop them. He couldn't look away now, he needed to see her response. What future would wait for her staying where she was now? She sagged, losing her back posture. She squeezed her eyes closed.

''If only it was so simple.''

He took her hand in his. ''It is, Rose. I can't walk away knowing he will hurt you, that you don't love him.''

''There is no easy way out of this.''

She leant against him for support. He kissed her forehead. It was then she realised that this was real, there was no going back. Jack genuinely felt the same as she did. He wanted her to be happy. Would that be with him?

''Nothing is easy if you really want it.'' Jack whispered to her. ''I want you to be happy.''

Going back to her life was Hell. Her stomach bubbled from nerves and utter dread, of the reaction which awaited her and if Cal was sober. Each step was causing her to tremble even more than the last. Jack had wanted to come with her but what use would that be? His very presence would stir up a lot more trouble than she even dared to think of. He could wind up hurt. She had to face this alone. Her eyes were stinging tired, her hair a mess of tumbling curls and yet Jack had still held her as they had said goodbye. Rose's appearance was a far cry from the vision she had been the night she and Jack had met and yet she was happy.

As soon as she entered the sitting room, she sensed his lingering presence.

''I had hoped you would come to me last night.'' Cal spoke quietly. The words he uttered each morning. Rose's eyes narrowed as she glanced at him before she pulled another lie from her book.

''I was tired.''

Cal nodded. ''I see.''

Silence fell between them almost as though they were strangers and not almost husband and wife.

''Your mother and I noted your absence from the dinner, also.''

Rose pressed her lips together, feeling the anger rise within. ''Cal, I am not a child.'' She told him forcefully. ''I ate elsewhere. The events of the last few days have reduced my appetite.'' That much was the truth. She started for her bedroom, one foot and then the other...

Cal felt the anger burning up inside him. ''Rose, I have given you everything. Look at the damned suite on Titanic, look at your clothes!''

''You can have it! Your money doesn't impress me, Cal. It never did.''

Cal laughed. ''No, but it impressed your Mother.''

Rose's hand came up and slapped Cal straight around the face. ''You knew full well of our situation. My father had left his young child and his wife in debt. That was not her fault.''

Cal touched his cheek, it stung. He had only been hit once before and that was by his father for his adolescent disobedience although with this strike, he could feel the force behind it; he felt her hatred. ''She took full advantage of my interest in you. She was only too happy to marry us off at the earliest convenience.''

''Then you should have turned a blind eye and walked the other way.'' She breathed out a deep sigh. ''I never loved you. I never wanted to marry you.''

''And yet you agreed.'' He came closer to her.

She cringed at his presence so close to her. ''I was young when I accepted your proposal. Too young to understand what a marriage entails. Now I cannot bear to think of it.''

''You wouldn't see your mother out on the streets or taking work as a seamstress. I know that you still wouldn't want to see that.'' He raised his eyebrow. ''Women like yourselves wouldn't find work.'' He laughed at the notion.

Rose couldn't believe that he would use that as a weapon. She ignored his pleading stare. ''My happiness comes first for once.''

''What would you do if I left you? Go live on the streets like some urchin?'' Cal laughed pathetically. Rose watched how he sat on his own high horse as though he could never come back down. She would not stand there with him.

''It'd be damned well better than being your wife!''

Cal narrowed his eyes. ''You wouldn't walk out on this engagement for your whole existence would be a shamble!''

Rose grabbed her purse and kept her calm. ''I cannot be stopped.''

She stormed past him and walked from the room slamming the door behind her. She had not been dressed and ready for the day's events for an hour yet. The anger burnt within her and she could feel the hot tears filling her eyes threatening to fall but she refused to allow them to. When angry or passionate, her emotions seemed to get the better of her.

Rose didn't venture far, she found her mother's room empty. She heard Cal slam the door and then leave through the sitting room entrance. He had suspected her to have left the stateroom. She breathed a sigh of relief and quickly found herself rummaging around in the wardrobe. She found a small bag, just big enough for necessities. She found three dresses which had been given to her Mother by the second-class family and stuffed them into her bag. She found some pins on the dresser and took them also.

Shakily, Rose attempted to button up her coat while her eyes darted around the room trying to find anything else which she might find useful to pack. Her mind couldn't focus on anything else other than leaving and never returning.

''That's everything.'' She whispered to herself. She grasped the bag so tightly until her knuckles were white. She left no note, no indication of her whereabouts. A blanket lay over the bed and she took it, fashioning it into a headscarf and tucking away her curls to ensure that she could not be recognized. She held the bag in her left hand shakily opening the door with her right.

She scanned the sitting room; her Mother and Trudy's voice was audible from the bathroom and her stomach sank. She wasn't alone like she thought. She had a two second decision to stay or leave yet her feet were already leading her towards the door. The corridor was endless as she passed different faces, some familiar and others new. She heard their chatter, the children's cries…

''Miss?'' An elderly European lady grasped Rose's arm. She stopped immediately.

''Yes.''

''Time? You have time piece?'' She gestured in broken English.

Rose shook her head. ''Sorry I don't.''

''6.30pm,'' a passing steward offered, ''we're almost reaching New York.''

Rose kept her head down to ensure the steward couldn't see her face.

''How soon?''

''Couple of hours' ma'am.''

She thanked the steward and continued on her way down the corridor. She found an exit onto the deck and felt the wind outside. The rain still drizzled as darkness fell over the sky. She pulled her blanket further over her as the wind blew harshly in her face, cold and damp.

She stopped at the rail for just a moment feeling the motion of the ship and in the distance, she could see land. New York. She felt content. The lights...it was a place when she first started this trip that she was dreading the site of and now as she faced her home, she couldn't help but wish she was already there.

Just over a week ago she had boarded the Titanic as the fiancé of a millionaire's son. Her life had been lavish, money was the center of everything and she had sacrificed her own happiness for that of her mothers, to ensure the family name was respectable. A week later she couldn't comprehend the events; she wore a scarf to hide her identity and a bag in one hand carrying all which she had managed to take to her new life.

Jack had told her to not marry Cal. She hadn't expected to follow through with it. She was. Not just for him, but for herself.

''Rose?''

She turned at his voice. He was a few feet away in front of her, his hair wet and sticking to his face.

''Jack,'' she picked up her pace until she reached him, dropping her bag onto the deck, it cluttered as it landed to the floor. He held her, his wet overcoat soggy from the coat but neither cared. It felt as though she hadn't seen him for years.

''I was scared you going back to him alone.''

He pressed his cheek to hers. She pulled the blanket from her head to allow him to see her face. She grasped his coat not caring about much rain fell onto her hair. What did it matter? Truth was it refreshed her.

Her eyes sparkled in the light of the dim decks. His eyes fell to the deck, a small duffel bag by his feet. He silently quizzed her.

''I left him.''

''What?''

''The ship will reach New York this evening. When we dock, I am getting off with you.''

In that moment she saw something in his eyes, just a flash. It was beautiful. ''This is crazy.''

She pressed her lips together. ''Maybe so,'' she moved his wet hair from his face, ''but I trust it.''

He pressed his hand to the back of her neck and he kissed her, with such ferocity she couldn't breathe. The rain continued to fall heavily onto them and onto the slippery decks of the Carpathia as she made her way towards Lady Liberty.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter seven:

Betrayed could not even cover it. There was no note, nothing but Rose had followed through with her threat. It had in fact been a promise. Cal had believed that she wouldn't leave. His eyes had been kept on the doors as dinner had been served out to them. His brandy had sat firmly in his hand as he already glanced about the room, full of immigrants, the fear in their eyes although with Rose there, all of that would have been a distraction to Cal as he had pushed his food about on his plate as he was eyed by those about him. Rose never arrived. She had left with Jack Dawson, he knew it. His teeth clenching together tightly that the pain in his jaw caused his eyes to squint. He had given her everything, provided for her, even opened the heart he never realised he had. He had fallen in love with her. Despite their doubts, he had believed their inpending nuptials to be a happy one. For the most part. He had been made a fool of, an utter fool. Jack Dawson, the scum Rose had barely spoken to. He had barely been of any use.

Ruth approached the sitting room, sensing some disturbance. ''What has happened?''

Cal turned on his heel to face her. ''Your daughter has left us.''

Ruth narrowed her eyes. Rose had not only lied to Cal but she had made him look like a complete fool. She was speechless for just a few moments.

''A bag was missing from my suite,'' Ruth began, ''the dresses also appeared to be missing.'' It seemed to come together in her head. She had believed herself to have misplaced the gifted dresses.

''Your daughter has left with Jack Dawson.'' He repeated. Ensuring the news settled firmly into Ruth's head.

Ruth brought her hand to her mouth. She shook her head in disbelief. ''Wherever could she go? I warned her of such things.''

''You knew?''

Ruth clamped her mother shut. ''She cared for him, I knew that much. We had a discussion the morning of the sinking...''

Ruth stood from the couch. She began to pace the sitting room floor. ''Oh Lord.''

Cal walked to the liquor stand and poured two glasses of brandy. Ruth didn't usually drink such strong liquor at this hour no less but with the situation, she needed it.

Cal looked to Ruth. ''The clothes are not our property; they must be returned. Money has also gone from my coat pocket.'' He raised his eyebrows. ''Three or four thousand.''

Ruth's mouth curved into an 'o'. ''My daughter would not-''

''Rose wouldn't. _He_ would.''

Ruth found it difficult to swallow. ''Cal, what are you proposing?''

''I will have him arrested. Robbery. He took what was mine.''

He necked what was left of his brandy as Ruth still nursed hers. ''But she cannot be far, perhaps she will return. The money could have been...''

He felt the anger build up inside, he smashed his fists into the wood of the drawers but he did not even feel a flash of pain. Empty brandy bottles cluttered the room and cigar butts littered the floor, the masses he had collected over the days aboard. ''She will NOT return. How stupid can you be?'' He snapped.

Ruth immediately backed away having never seen such an outburst not even the heated discussion with her husband had created such a farce.

''Caledon Hockley, never speak to me in such a way again.'' She pressed her hand to her mouth. She couldn't face another sip of brandy knowing what it did to such people. She feared Rose's departure, but surely it was just one of her silly games? She would return. She was sure of it.

''Ruth, she must be found. I will go after her myself.''

Before he could be stopped, he was gone, a bottle in his hand and his jacket a trail in his wake. The silence suddenly hit Ruth, she felt the panic rise in her stomach. She went to the bedroom, closing the door behind her. She could not think whilst surrounded by such clutter in the sitting room. This was not Cal. This was a monster.

Out on deck,

Jack felt Rose grasp the back of his neck tighter and as he looked endlessly into her eyes, his finger traced a line over her cheekbones and her nose and finally to her lips, he lingered his finger for a while on her lip and she kissed it gently. They stood at the rail, the same place where he had found her. He didn't want them to move, the New York lights growing closer and just within their reach.

Footsteps grew louder and more violent as they approached the deck. Rose broke away from Jack, to see a figure heading towards them. She thrust her scarf over her wet hair and Jack picked up her duffel bag in one hand as he grasped her hand in his other. He narrowed his eyes in the darkness in a vague attempt to see who it was.

Caledon Hockley was vile even visually at this moment in time. His body a drunken stupor. He reeked of upper class, so obviously obnoxious. Jack came face to face with him almost as he thrust Rose behind him. His black hair was gelled back so masterfully, his eyes the colour of pure evil. He smiled to reveal perfect white teeth; Jack would have done anything to personally remove every single one of them just for the one blow he had dealt Rose.

''Rose, don't be stupid. Come back out of this rain.'' Cal held out his hand to her, like he was leading a child away from trouble.

Jack was silent. Rose parted her lips to speak, but he continued.

''I thought she had run away on her own accord. But you, Dawson...you are a different matter. Perhaps if _my_ Rose witnessed the injury she had caused, she would think twice about running away again.''

It didn't look as though he wanted a fight at all, with how impeccably he was dressed. Jack almost laughed to himself. What could he possibly do? In just a second, Cal lunged Jack in the stomach and he immediately fell to the floor in such pain. It was a blow he hadn't expected. He let out a cry of pain to which Rose responded by crying. Cal grasped her arm with such force, she couldn't get out of it.

''No, Cal. I told you I am leaving!'' She screamed. ''Jack!''

Jack struggled to breathe for several minutes, his eyes blurred from the blow. He gritted his teeth, knowing he would have a fight on his hands but he glanced at Rose and knew this would all be worth it. He would fight until he laid dead on the ground. He got to his feet, his stomach tight and his knees trembling. He came closer to Cal; he knew what to expect this time and he had been angered, he wouldn't allow Cal to hurt her anymore.

''Rose is my fiancée, not yours.''

''That is horse shit!''

Jack grabbed Cal pushing him backwards into the rail, un-joining his hand from Rose's, before grabbing a nearby piece of wood and aiming it at his kneecaps. Cal crumpled in agony and clutched his knee as he grasped the rail for support, quickly Jack turned to Rose, taking her hand in his, when he heard something click behind him. Turning, he saw the Cal holding a gun.

Rose backed away into the rail but Cal grabbed her. He pointed the gun to her head. Jack panicked but tried to not let the feeling show. He saw just how rough Cal handled Rose. Jack reached into his boot and pulled out the knife he had won in the poker game, to which Cal laughed pitifully. There wasn't even a competition. He threw it at Cal.

''You can have that. It's my only weapon. Hurt me, don't touch her. Take my life, not hers.'' He begged for Rose's freedom.

Rose glanced to the side to see the pistol pointed to her head, she struggled to breathe.

''Let him go. I am yours. I will marry you. Just let him go, please.'' She willed Cal. She would do anything to ensure Jack was not hurt.

''Alright. Then I should kill him?''

Rose squeezed her eyes closed.

''You wouldn't dare shoot.'' Jack taunted.

''Beg me, Rose.'' He took the gun away from her head and aimed it at Jack, yet his grip on Rose tightened around her waist. ''Beg for me to shoot him.''

She refused to with a shake of her head. He slapped her straight across her cheek with his right hand, her shawl exposing her face to the cold air. It stung.

''There will be more unless you beg me Rose...''

''Rose...'' Jack's voice was almost weak. She could sense something in him, almost as though he was giving up.

Rose felt a tear fall down her face. She nodded her head, swiftly once, not taking her eyes away from Jack.

''Alright.''

''Sorry?''

''I said alright! Shoot him.'' She barked the orders to Cal. He grinned in absolute joy. He pulled the trigger but nothing came out. Jack waited to die, for the bullet to take his life but it didn't. The gun was unloaded….The gun was unloaded…

Jack took a moment to realise that Rose had done it. She had unloaded his gun at some point. She must have known it would come to this. Quickly he lured for Cal, dragging him away from Rose. They scrambled to the floor and he felt Cal's hand wrap around his throat. They found their way to their feet. Cal tightened the grip around his throat and Jack felt himself choking, he attempted to cough but nothing would come out. Cal watched as Jack's face grew redder as he squeezed tighter. Jack felt the life slowly drain from him, his feet almost didn't touch the ground and when he reached out his hands for something to grab but there was nothing within his reach.

''Cal no!'' Rose screamed. ''Let him go, please.'' She pleaded. She attempted to pull Cal away from Jack but he simply back handed her and a slap landed across her face.

''You shut up and get away. I'll deal with you later.'' He spat.

From nowhere, Jack found the strength to bring his knee up into Cal's stomach and send him flying backwards and he tumbled backwards onto the floor. Cal put up a good fight, obviously not used to losing. His good clothes were ripped, his body aching. Jack had enough, he couldn't take this anymore. The anger inside of him had boiled over way too much. Cal reached forward to retrieve the knife which Jack had dropped earlier, Jack lunged forward knocking it from his grip and the smug look was soon wiped away from his face. Rose screamed, not wanting Cal to hurt Jack. Jack felt the blood trickle from his nose from Cal's punch; again he lunged for him, knocking him into the rail. Rose screamed to Jack to stop. Jack held Cal against the wall with his throat and he could only move his eyes. He knew what it felt like.

He lifted his foot kicking Cal in the stomach and winding him sending him flying backwards against a deck chair. Jack could taste the blood but he wouldn't give up yet, Cal came for him but this time he was prepared he quickly moved out of the way sending Cal crashing onto the floor. Blood gushed from his face.

Grabbing him by the scruff of his collar he thrust him to the rail.

''You should have been in water with the rest of us. I thought I would not live to see another day.'' Jack's eyes were red, bulging. His anger tipping out of his mouth. ''You know what it is like to see 1500 souls freezing to death around you? To hear the survivors, cry at night?''

Rose sobbed. Cal's upper body was almost hanging over the ship. ''Jack?''

Jack breathed heavily through his nose, he couldn't see for complete anger overtook him. Cal was scared, he admitted as much. He shakily reached into his pocket. He had some dignity left. He pulled out a wad of money, too shocked to speak. Jack laughed pitifully.

''Your money doesn't interest me, sir. Nor will it save you.''

Jack threw him backwards and Cal went flying onto the deck. His clothes were ripped, bloody and he couldn't move. His money flew about him before landing and sticking to the wet deck. Rose stood over him. Her wet hair sticking to her face but it was her eyes which spoke the most. They didn't waver.

''Don't talk. Just listen. We will make a deal, since that is something you understand. From this moment you do not exist for me, nor I for you. You shall not see me again. And you will not attempt to find me. Your actions need never come to light, and you will get to keep the honour you have carefully purchased.''

She shook from both fear and anger. Cal said nothing, he simply lay his limp head down. Rose thought she sensed a small nod but she didn't stay around long enough to confirm it. Jack had a hold of the bag which she had fetched with her. He led her back to their new life. Where she would stay.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter eight:

 _April 18, 1912_

The early evening rain poured down over New York City. The clouds were as gray and gloomy as the mood. Since mid-afternoon, people had lined the docks, awaiting the arrival of the Carpathia. Relatives and friends of most of the Titanic passengers awaited news; news of whether the people closest to them had actually been lost in the greatest disaster ever known. Journalists and cameramen joined them, as well as priests and several nuns. An ambulance and embalmers had also been requested at the scene. It was silent, with shifting eyes.

It was around eight when the Carpathia had pulled into the docks. Passengers stood on deck, with little or no luggage in their hands. Some were happy for this journey to be over. Others didn't want to face life without their lost ones but land was a happy sight to behold but a lonely one.

The Statue of Liberty was in close sight. Lady Liberty, who cast a light over the whole of the great city.

Taking Jack's hand in hers, Rose allowed herself a moment of freedom. She was enthralled by the beautiful statue. All of her life she had wished to view her and now, here she was; standing proud and tall in front of her, she shed tears of joy. This was a symbol of her newfound freedom. She turned to Jack, who pulled her closer to him. He was just happy to be home and well.

''We're home." Jack's voice was soft. He spoke more so, to himself. This was a place he hadn't foreseen returning to in a long while. Perhaps, both of them had fears of returning somewhere in their stomachs but that would be something they could work on, together.

Rose nodded. "Yes.''

''There is no going back, is there?'' He turned to her. He wanted to know for sure. He wanted to know if she wanted this as much as he did. As much as he loved her.

"No, Jack. I don't want to lose you.'' She turned back to Lady Liberty, her eyes so fixated. ''I came so close because of my fears of Cal. But we have come this far." To lose him now would be like dying herself. They had reached home, they had fought off all of their uncertainty and fear, they had even tried to fight their own feelings, but that had failed. Love always did seem to conquer all, even death.

 **She** was the butterfly trapped inside the jar, not him and she had needed to release herself and to not be released. She had found her way out. Jack had taught her to spread her wings.

The wind hit their faces, awakening Rose's senses. Jack pulled her to him with a small bag in his hand containing all they owned in the world. An officer approached them with a clipboard and pen. ''Can I take your names please?''

''Dawson.'' Jack told him, simply.

''Jack and Rose Dawson.'' She replied, her eyes never leaving Jack's.

"Thank you." The officer walked away.

Jack questioned her with his eyes. "I don't wish to be found. Rose DeWitt Bukater died with the Titanic. It's time to start living. If a mindless insect can exchange one life for another, then why can't I?"

Jack shook his head with disbelief at the beautiful woman before him. She was so strong, so brave, and such an inspiration to him. They turned back to the sight of the Statue.

 **An hour later, at the Cunard pier, Pier 54.**

Over thirty thousand people lined the dock and filled the surrounding streets. Anything to catch a glimpse of the scene. The magnesium flashes of the photographers went off like small bombs, lighting an amazing tableau. Several hundred police kept the mob back. The dock was packed with friends and relatives, officials, ambulances, and the press- Reporters and photographers swarmed everywhere... 6 deep at the foot of the gangways, lining the tops of cars and trucks. They jostled to get close to the survivors, tugging on them as they passed and shouting over each other to ask them questions.

Rose was covered with a woollen shawl and walked with a group of steerage passengers, Jack gripping her hand close behind. Immigration officers were asking them questions as they come off the gangway. Rose uttered a few words as best she can, the complete circus around them felt like a dream. The officer steered her and Jack toward a holding area for processing. Rose walked forward with the dazed immigrants. Jack stood behind her, together they said nothing. There were no words to say to each other. All they could now was wait.

The boom of photographer's magnesium flashes caused them to flinch, and the glare was blinding. There was a sudden disturbance near them as two men burst through the cordon, running to embrace an older woman along the survivors, who cried out with joy. The reporters converged on this emotional scene, and flashes exploded.

Jack used this moment to slip away into the crowd. Rose scurried closely beside him, covered in a shawl. His fingers linked with her, with his squeezing tightly to ensure they were not separated – not again. They pushed through the jostling people, moving with purpose, and no one challenged them in the confusion. They were no longer important.

The rain continued to pour down on them as they figured out what their next steps would be. Their backs ached, their legs like jelly but still they ran knowing that looking back was not an option. Even through their exhaustion, they still ran, they had hope for something.

It was another hour or so before Jack spotted a hotel signs. After knocking on the door of house, it appeared a friendly middle-aged round woman ran the establishment. Fifty cents a night and an extra thirty for breakfast and dinner. They agreed.

Throwing the duffel bag on the bed, Jack sat on it. Rose's eyes glanced about the room, just as they had done the hall, the downstairs area. She had never seen a hotel so, run down. Or was this the type of accomodation she would have to grow used to.

''This is rather good.'' Jack answered her query.

This was something she would have to grow used to. The floors were wooden albeit slightly worn and the wallpaper appeared to be Victorian but to say they had paid very little; the room wasn't so bad. They couldn't spend too much money knowing now they had more time to make their way now.

Rose wondered if she could work or would that be too risky. Maybe pick up the odd job here and there pick up a weeks' worth of wage and move on using a different name each time.

The door clicked shut and Jack turned to Rose. She had her eyes closed and he touched the small of her back with his right hand rubbing it slightly and her eyes flickered open.

''How do you feel?''

Rose moved closer to Jack and he placed his arm around her shoulder. ''Tired and yet I feel awake.''

Kicking away her shoes, she lifted both of her feet onto the bed and laid herself down, she had barely slept since her first night aboard the Titanic.

''It will all be all right.''

''I know.'' She muttered tiredly, feeling her eyes roll around slightly. Jack smiled, lying beside her but propping himself up on his elbow and his dark blonde hair hung in his face. Rose studied his face carefully, he appeared so young, he was beautiful. His tan skin, the freckles over his nose, the chicken pox scars on his forehead, his button nose and pouted lips and of course his gorgeous light blue eyes. His hair hung in his eyes and Rose lifted her hand slightly moving the hair away.

''I have never been alone with a man before. Not like this.'' She swallowed nervously.

He pressed his lips to her forehead and she closed her eyes. ''Don't worry.''

''I trust you.'' She whispered into his neck.

Jack smiled as he ran his fingers through her auburn locks which spread out on the pillow he did nothing but laugh at her comment. He entwined his fingers with hers and ran his thumb over her hand. They remained silent for a while just enjoying been next to each other, getting used to the feel of having another beside them, and before they knew it they were asleep.

Rose awoke to the sound of water swishing and then hitting something. She thought she was dreaming until she opened one eye to find Jack pouring boiling water which he had heated on the fireplace into an uncomfortable tin bath.

''I'm sorry, did I wake you?'' He winced.

She sat upright feeling the pain in her back from the bed. ''Yes.''

He set the kettle down on the fire and stood up straight. ''I thought I could use a bath.'' He told her quietly. ''I-just-'' He looked about before realising just what he was about to say, he hadn't thought through. He glanced at Rose.

''Shall I leave?'' She offered, sitting at the edge of the bed and trying to not notice the fact he was just wearing a shirt, which was transparent.

He blushed a little bit. ''Perhaps just stand outside the door?''

She stood from the bed and stretched a little as she did so. She didn't feel so tired anymore, suddenly she was wide awake with something. ''I will take one after you, if that's all right.''

She went to the door and it fell open ajar. She couldn't see inside. He felt guilty asking her to leave. ''Sure.''

Quickly he shed his shirt. Rose stood outside with her arms folded. She glanced at her feet, anything to distract her.

''There is some soap in my bag.'' She remembered taking some from her mother's room.

''Thanks.'' He called.

Jack went to the bag placed on the floor beside the bed. It was then Rose saw through the door. He was shirtless. She blinked several times before squeezing her eyes closed. Her heart began to beat so quickly that she had to take deep breathes to calm herself.

She heard the water splash, a sign he was in the bath. She had to stop herself from peeking through the door again. She walked around in circle, biting her nail which was something which she never did. She focused on the mustard yellow walls of the hallway with the strange flowers...how ghastly!

''Are you all right?'' He called out.

''Yes.'' She lied. She noticed she was barefoot. She had never walked around without shoes in her life. She smiled to herself, what a difference this life was.

He continued to splash and move and within minutes she felt as though she had been outside for hours. ''Is the water warm?''

''Yes,'' he called, ''I haven't felt water so warm this year.''

Rose smiled, remembering when Jack told her that he barely encountered hot water. ''Did Paris not offer such luxuries?'' She teased.

''Not once.''

''The naked girls must have been the reason for your interest.'' She felt a stab of jealousy as she spoke, like a silly school girl.

She heard him stand in the tub and rustle about with something. She didn't even know if there was a towel. ''I had no interest in them.''

She raised her eyebrow. ''So you didn't have any love affairs whilst you were there?''

Seconds later he came to the door. He wore his pants and his shirt was open. Her eyes travelled down to his taut chest and his wet hair hung limply in his eyes. She couldn't speak.

''No, Rose. No interest in them at all.''

She stepped back inside, silently. He grabbed her hand and tightly threaded his fingers through hers.

''Jack-'' Something had shifted between them and she didn't know what it was. The room was warm from the steam of the water. A dim lamp lit the room. She could feel her heart pounding in her ears, her breathing still ragged. She was dizzy.

He pulled her to him. ''I have never loved a woman before you.'' His voice tickled her ears.

She stopped breathing for a second and closed her eyes long enough to realize what he had told her. She placed a shaking hand on his bare chest and he reached out to her. How could one single touch cause every nerve in her body to tingle so? His hands threaded through her hair, down the base of her neck and down her spine. He halted at the bottom, grasping her hips ever so slightly. His touch was hesitant and gentle, driven by her beauty and the longing to love her.

She turned, her eyes burning into his. They ran down to his bare chest and then up to his lips. She could tell his breathing had quickened. He leant forward to kiss her and she parted her lips, the kiss was deeper than before. His hand came up to her throat and his other hand came to her waist. She had never experienced such dizziness, she relied on him for stability. His tongue touched hers and she fell into a deeper spiral of overwhelming intoxication. He moved to her neck as her eyes lazily closed as she clung to his sleeves. She shivered as he kissed along her shoulder and could taste the saltiness of her skin. She ran her hands up his arms to his shoulders where her fingers met his bare skin. Their eyes found the others, the passion mirrored.

''I was scared of that fire burning out. You could only suppress it for so long. I will never stop that.''

His words were so real. She continued to kiss him. Her spark was back. She felt as though she was on fire but more than anything she needed him to make love to her.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter nine:

Rain thrashed against the window and Rose wondered if it would even hold with such force. It rattled before it temporarily settled once more. Rose draped her left arm over Jack's chest. They were still naked with their bodies pressed so close together. This whole experience was new to her. The intimacy which came with Jack was so beautiful. She fought sleep as she felt so peaceful, they had laid in silence for some time with their own thoughts. This moment was one which she never wanted to end. Jack's fingers threaded through her hair and she could feel his breathing so steady and the strong beat of his heart. She contemplated everything in her head, just how happy she was laying here with him. She thought of how many other women he had been so intimate with, if any.

''How many lovers have you had?'' Her curiosity would surely be a surprise to him but it was a thought she would never consider asking a man, yet since he had loved her, she felt the need to know.

She propped herself up on her elbow to look at him. Her voice was soft but full of wonder. He stroked her hair as he hesitated his answer.

''Just the one. A girl in California.'' He told her, honestly. ''I was drunk and I wasn't in love with her.''

She laid her head back on his chest, satisfied with his answer. She relished the feel of her skin against his.

He had told her there had been no women in Paris. She knew so little about this man yet she trusted him enough to share her body with him.

''You're my only.'' She whispered.

He kissed her hair. He had suspected. He was overwhelmed with what he felt for her. He moved to his side. ''Did I hurt you?''

''No.''

He was silent for a moment before stroking her hair. The desperation to kiss him built up within her. She touched his chest and he closed his eyes. She knew he was fighting between the seriousness of the conversation and the damned urge to make love to her again.

''You didn't hurt me. It's all right for you to want more.''

He let out a huge breath before kissing her once again. It was full of intensity; the desperation to cling to each other's body as though their lives depended on it. Within seconds, her naked body was pressed against his and her nails dug into his bare back as she struggled to fight her feelings once more.

''I don't want to hurt you.'' He whispered in her ear.

''You don't.'' She held onto his shoulders. Her nose buried into his neck and then he leant up on his elbows before moving the hair from her neck.

 _Three months later_

 _Santa Monica_

He held her hand, so tightly, as though he could never let go. His shirt was unbuttoned, flapping as they ran along in the warm breeze of the night. They were alone. It was well after midnight. They tried to silence their giggles but they found it difficult to. Her cheeks were red and flushed, her skirts billowed as she ran. The look of joy on her face was enough to make Jack the happiest man in the world. Every few feet he would stop to touch her face, to check as though she was really his. But she was.

Sand covered their shoes and the dust kicked up as they walked. A series of rocks came into view and Jack realised they had reached the end. He sighed, not wanting the night to end. They would have to find somewhere to sleep soon, someplace safe.

Jack scrambled over the rock. It was only knee high to him but he knew Rose would struggle more. He held out his hand to her as she hitched up her skirts. With one swift motion, she was over the rocks. Jack lost his balance and they stumbled backwards onto a grassy patch. Their giggles pierced the quiet air and Jack placed his hand over Rose's mouth to shush her. Her dress wrapped itself around her legs. She stretched her arms out feeling the coolness of the grass on her arms and between her fingers. Jack kissed her neck as he trailed his way down to her chest. She closed her eyes focusing on the coolness and then the shivers which Jack caused. She ran her fingers through his hair. When she opened her eyes, she could see the clear sky above. The millions of stars which twinkled endlessly. She sighed with such contentment that Jack stopped kissing her.

''Are you all right?''

He came to lay beside her.

''Yes of course.'' She propped herself up on Jack's chest. ''I just enjoy looking at the stars.''

He too watched the endless beauty of the sky. Although they couldn't keep his attention for long, every few seconds he would glance down at Rose. Just to see her contentment. He relished the fact that she was happy. He felt the warmth in his stomach, the smile which couldn't help but creep onto his face without him even knowing.

''They are so clear tonight.''

''It is a warm night.'' Jack whispered. Rose had her hands up Jack's bare chest. This time he closed his eyes, feeling the tickle. ''But not sticky hot, it will be perfect to sleep with a breeze over our bodies.''

Rose lifted herself onto her left elbow as she hovered over Jack. Her hair tickled his face and she flicked it away as she leant forward to kiss him just once. ''Shall we sleep here tonight?''

Jack shook his head. ''No. This is too open.''

He diverted his attention from her for a second. She was close to him. So damn close he could kiss her until they forgot how to breathe.

Rose got to her feet, hesitantly. She dusted the grass from her skirt and watched as Jack also stood and fastened the buttons on his shirt. He ran a quick hand through his hair to neaten it out before he held out his hand to her. It slipped into his so perfectly as they silently continued their way through the unfamiliar neighbourhood. The houses were set far back away from the road along the line of the beach. Jack's mind wondered to the not so distant future. He wanted to find a home for he and Rose. He wanted some sort of stability for her despite their passion for travel. He had so many plans in his head, if money would allow such things.

They were miles away from their usual sleeping place. Jack knew Rose would be too tired to walk the whole way back. Her body sagged already. He placed his arm around her waist to provide more stability for her.

The houses seem to cease by the end of a road and a large dirt track loomed. A vehicle sat on the end. Jack let go of Rose's hand and went to investigate. She followed closely behind, curious. She tucked a curl behind her ear as she watched him run to the driver's side. He ran his hand over the smoothness of the door. He clicked the door to find it opened. He glanced around. They were in complete darkness. The car must have been left here for some time, he decided. Rose climbed in the passenger side. She giggled having never sat in the front of a vehicle before. She tucked her skirts in before closing the door.

''Have you driven before?'' She whispered, fearing her voice would travel across the night.

He found her eyes in the dark. ''Yes. Once or twice.''

She giggled. ''Should I trust you?''

''Of course!''

His eyes glinted with mischief in the darkness. Butterflies swirled around her stomach. She knew this was stealing but neither of them had thought of the consequences. He started the car with such ease and with a quick glance around he drove them further down the dirt paths. It was pitch black for a moment.

''At least it doesn't need winding up.'' He laughed.

''Do you not need the lights on?''

Jack fiddled with the buttons in the darkness and seconds later the cars lights flashed on. She laughed at his fumble.

''Thank you for that.'' He grabbed her hand as he slowly drove down the dirt track. The trees surrounded them dipping over up and ahead as though it was creating an archway for them. She linked her fingers around his. Her left hand in his right. For a second he could barely concentrate on driving, the way she tickled his fingers with her nail was enough for him to lose his concentration. He stopped the car for a second.

''You should try this.'' He urged her.

''No!''

''Why not. Come on.''

She looked at the driver's seat. Nerves came over her. ''I never thought I could drive a car.''

Jack shook his head. ''You can do anything you want to.''

In just those few words she found some sort of strength to cling to. She lifted up her skirts around her knees and reached out to hold onto the seat. Jack grabbed her hips to shuffle her across his lap and move himself into the passenger seat. Her head almost touched the roof. He placed his hand on the back of her hair so that she didn't bang her head as she moved. Seconds later she wound up straddling him. She giggled so hard she could barely move. Jack pushed her with one swift motion and she was in the driver's seat.

She clammed up for a second. She wasn't used to this.

''Don't worry. Just start the engine.'' Jack told her gently.

Shakily, she started the vehicle. She could feel the steering wheel vibrate as she did.

''Oh God, Jack.''

''Now just slowly steer your way down the path.''

She closed her eyes for a second and took a deep breath. Slowly, she steered them slowly. They literally crawled for a moment until the vehicle jolted and within seconds was dipped to the right.

''Shit!'' She cursed. The right wheel had fell into a ditch.

Jack laughed. ''It's all right. You did really good.''

''I did not!'' She went to reach for the door but Jack stopped her. He took her left hand in his and pulled her to him with such force that she wound up on his lap. She took a sharp intake of breath, shocked from the moment and nervous at been so close to him.

''Never speak ill of yourself, Rose.'' He whispered to her as he stroked her cheek. She found his gaze in the darkness. The seriousness fell over his face. He ran his hand through her hair to move it from their faces. She moved her legs over his lap so that they knelt each side of him so that it pushed her body closer to his. She entwined their fingers and he squeezed her hand. She ran a finger up his arm with her right hand and up to his face. She felt the few days' worth of stubble. She didn't mind it. She diverted her eyes for a second, their stare too intense for her. At times like this she wondered how they had lasted so long without making love. It had been three months and while she didn't regret their one beautiful night together, they had both not spoken of it since.

Then at these times, she knew it would soon be inevitable. The chemistry between them was too much and they couldn't fight it for much longer. She sighed, she felt dizzy. He leant forward and kissed her cheek.

''Are you all right?''

She nodded against his chest. ''I keep feeling this...'' She laughed but to herself. The intense feelings swamping her.

Jack placed his hand on her face. Her forehead rested against his. He fought with his own feelings for a moment. The way which they had been thrown together had been in the most horrendous way but he didn't want that to affect their future. He had never wanted to be with her because their only connection was the sinking. He had wanted her to be his before that.

''I keep falling in love with you.'' He whispered to her. ''I want you to have this life which you deserve. I worry that isn't enough sometimes.''

She pulled away from him to see the vulnerability on his face. The words which he had kept inside for weeks, he hadn't wanted to spoil their happiness. She struggled to contain anything inside herself anymore. The feelings which had been bubbling up beneath the surface for weeks. She had said 'I love you' once before as in that moment, she believed that they would die.

''I love you, Jack.'' She felt tears forming in the corner of her eye. ''I have never been so happy. I want to live my life with you. Out here.''

That was all he needed to hear. He cradled her so close and tightly to his body with such emotion he feared he would burst.

 **Thank you all for reading!**


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